be committed

what is duty to you?
is it something you take for granted. something you neglect. something trivial.
after all those mega planning. all those vision to change things.
all those talks about making everything better.
where are all those resolve now? what happened to those burning desire to give it all. to achieve. to prove.
where are your commitment?? what is your commitment??

keep on running away from your duties. your obligations.
you are making others pay for your own insensitivity.
are you aware that people are crying for what you did. what you are doing.
are you aware that all your burdens are transferred to someone else's shoulder? your supposed duty.
are you even aware of all that?

fuck you! 

if you cannot commit to what you are supposed to to.
why did you agree in the first place?
if you cannot differentiate what's important and what's not.
why have you not tell anyone anything about it?
if it's so hard for you.
then what is the use of others around you.
if you cannot cope then the least you could do is to own up to it.

you blame others for what you are doing. why do you want to do what people are doing to you?
don't you believe in karma?
pick up yourself and do your job no matter what people say about you.
you should be your own judge.
let others do or say whatever they want to. just let them be.

"no matter how others trouble me, i should try my hardest not to trouble them" 
you should hold on to this.
make this your resolve.
you might find out that it is easier this way. in the end.

you know what?
your insensitivity had caused pain towards others.
do you even know about that? or do you even care?

you had pledge yourself towards a cause.
see it to the very end.
instead of bullshitting halfway.
you'll only become a nuisance to others.
a freaking tumor.

stop it. just stop it.
you should start to realize by now.
you should try to change starting from now.
you should take control instead of letting it slip like you don't care.
you can't?
then..

fuck you! 

others have their lives to attend to. you're not the only one.
others have their limits too. not just you.
others are able to talk and walk. why shouldn't you?
others could give their commitment albeit all the hardships and struggles. why can't you??

you want others to respect you.
start respecting them first. and respect your own duty.
not loathe it.

come on.
be committed would you? can't you?

get a grip on yourself.

tribute :)

happy holidays!
my 3rd semester is officially over! wohoooo!
alhamdulillah.

oh my. a lot has happened this semester. i don't know where to begin if i were to talk about it.
good or bad. that's natural.

what concerns me is how well did i do for this semester. academically that is.
i have not been the most hardworking student but to say that i have not made any effort is not right either.
i hope that those puny little efforts of mine will bear fruit when the results is out.

for all i know my carry marks are all well and good except for one.
spanish the menace.
out of 60 i got only 25 marks total. that leaves me another 15 marks at least to pass. which i hope i had done enough to get in my finals paper.
god knows how i did mine. :)
then again, i felt good leaving the exam hall after the spanish paper. it seems that i have a bright chance to pass after all. but of course that is only my feeling.
i just have to wait for the moment of truth.

not all is as bad as the other. this semester i got to learn to play handball. that counts as something isn't it? :)
for my own pride i got an A for handball. which i enjoy every single week. frankly speaking. i kinda miss playing handball.

*sigh*

syntax, phonetics, hospitality, spanish, handball, ict, and critical reading
may i did the best i could!
and i did not go through all these alone.
i am lucky to have friends. great people around me. charismatic and intelligent. kind and thoughtful.
without them i would not have the wits to get through this semester.

syukri (cuki), farhan, najib, hamzi, afiq, sayid, nik nor nabilah anis (peah), ina, erin, din, yana, syue, mira, laila, syafiq, akim, rusidy (mosh), akram, and anyone who has helped me through this whole semester.

^^ v

you people are some great people i have known and all i have for you guys are the well wishes that come from the deepest of my heart. THANK YOU!! i love you people.
without you guys i would never know what to do.
i would be like a kite with no strings.
you guys are the best. BA (englishers) are the best!!

All is well!

my 21st

17 december.
the day of my birth has come yet again.
i was really excited to celebrate it with faz but unfortunately i had to go on a program with my handball co-curricular group. what worse could happen at this supposed-to-be-happy day of my life.
what i wished i could do is just to go out and spend time and being happy. but things just won't go the way we wanted.

being tired the whole day, i slept immediately after coming back from the program. until night that is.
the only celebration that i had was just a nice little dinner with faz.
or so i thought~
after the dinner, we sat and just had a chat together.
surprisingly the cyberlab in my college was quiet.
cyberlab being quiet? very unlikely. but that's what happened.
until one by one my friends emerged.
the thing is.
one of my friend, yana, her birthday is a day after mine. which make hers on the 18th of december.
which is supposed to be THAT night.
so they spell out their plans to prank yana who has always been the mastermind behind pranks on others before. naughty yana. :)
and they asked me to join them. which i joined together with faz.

at first, there were just a cake which the candles were very difficult to blow. every time yana or someone else tries to blow off the candles, they just re-ignited again. what type of candles they used really intrigued me.
cakes are for eating. but not for them it isn't.
they began smudging the cake on each other's faces. including me of course.
after that i thought it was over. we all went outside to just hang out it seems.
and suddenly tun out of nowhere began to throw powder around to yana. which started everything.
they were all running around screaming trying to powderise anyone they could.

at that time i was oblivious towards other things which is my mistake. all i remember was i got hit by something hard and slimy. euuwwwwww!

they threw bloody eggs at me! 

haha. if i could recall there were a total of 5 eggs that hit me. one did not 'hatch'.
which i took in order to get revenge! the others were too far away afraid that i would throw the egg at them. in the end it was unfortunate for my dear faz who i smashed the egg on top of her head.

sorry sayang~ ^^ v

i don't know if they planned it. but i was also included in their prank as they were celebrating both mine and yana's birthday.
after a long and tiring day, it was fun to have played around with friends. we don't get that much these days.
too much assignments and presentations to think about. :)

from the bottom of my heart. THANK YOU GUYS!! really meant a lot to me. it was a great 21st birthday.

credits to tun, syafiq, syuerodz, laila, mira, din, akim, syakir and finally beloved fazreen.
you guys were great.
hope i didn't miss anyone. :)

and my wishes to yana. HAPPY 20th BIRTHDAY YANA!! welcome to the 20th club. hehe. ^^ v


p/s : look what somebody gave me :)

faz bagi kat aku. sweet gila!! ^^ v

tag tag :)

aku kena tag. something something lah. aku tak faham apa benda ni sebenarnya. kena jawab beberapa soalan yang diberi. ada kawan rapat ni yang hantar. so ikut jelah. :)

okay.. here goes..

*3 perangai orang yang paling aku tak suka?

1) orang yang takde sensitivity langsung - tak pernah fikirkan pasal orang lain, nak ikut diri sendiri je.

2) aku menyampah orang yang tak boleh nak terima pandangan orang lain. apa benda je nak ikut dia. 

know it all sangat kau ni!

3) then aku tak suka orang yang bila depan aku senyum lebar tegur macam tak jumpa setahun, mesra ya amat. tapi belakang belakang buat sial dengan aku. hipokrit lah senang kata kan. tapi hipokrit ni luas skop dia. yang aku maksudkan hipokrit dengan aku. kalau dah tak suka tu cakap je tak suka. 

jangan nak berlakon baik!!

*bila stress aku buat apa?

ini memang pelik lah. dah jadi habit aku dah ni. bila aku stress, aku dengar lagu then aku jalan pusing pusing. keliling bilik ke, rumah ke, mana mana lah. macam tawaf. aku kena ada perasaan bergerak tu barulah aku boleh layan lagu. :) 

family, kawan kawan pastian, matriks, ngan kpz memang tau lah habit aku ni. 

hehe. ^^ v

*apa perancangan hidup aku?

emm. aku ingat lepas aku habis degree ni nak sambung master. insyaallah kalo ada rezeki kan. aku bukan pandai pun. :) 

then mesti lah nak kerja kan. yang stabil dan boleh menjamin hidup aku. 

lepas tu aku mestilah nak kahwin. siapa taknak kan. 

and aku nak life yang simple je. tak complicated sana sini sangat. 

aku nak 4 orang anak. hehe. meriah sikit. ^^ v

the rest Allah saja yang tau. aku cuma merancang.

*kenangan yang paling aku tak dapat lupakan

nak kata yang paling tu mcm tak boleh jugak. sebab kenangan tu banyak. 

1) aku suka sangat zaman aku form 4 form 5. itu zaman aku yang paling seronok dengan kawan kawan aku. budak kelas, cikgu cikgu aku. :) aku rindu lah zaman sekolah tu.

2) kedua time matrik. matrik ni lah yang banyak ajar aku. orang orang yang aku jumpa kat kolej matrikulasi melaka tu, buat aku tak boleh lupa sampai bila bila. banyak pengalaman yang aku go through dengan diorang. 

3) kemudian masa masa aku kat upm ni. kolej pendeta za'ba. walaupun aku still tak habis lagi kat sini, tapi buat masa ni aku rasa seronok sangat. benda benda yang aku join macam ragbi, teater, paintball dan banyak lagi. benda benda ni aku rasa aku tak pernah terfikir pun nak buat. tapi masuk upm ni aku dah rasa semua tu. :) 

*selain keluarga, siapa orang yang paling aku percaya dan kenapa??

orang yang paling aku percaya selain keluarga pastilah orang yang rapat dengan aku. orang orang ni aku tak anggap diorang sebagai kawan je tapi dah macam family aku sendiri. aku percaya orang orang ni sebab aku tau masa aku senang diorang pun tumpang senang. tapi bila aku susah diorang jugak lah sentiasa ada dengan aku. diorang tau je bila aku ada masalah. tak payah aku cakap pun. 

tak perlu lah aku bagitau siapa kan. sebab..

you know who you are. :) 

*suka memasak tak??

yes of course!! 

aku suka sangat memasak. aku suka tengok rancangan memasak yang selalu ada kat tv tu. aku kagum especially bila tengok lelaki yang memasak. impressive gila!

sebab selalunya orang kata memasak ni hal perempuan kan. 

dan sebab aku suka memasak gak sebab ayah aku hebat sangat memasak. dia boleh masak macam macam. western ke eastern ke apa ke. semua dia boleh. 

aku nak belajar daripada dia. tapi buat masa sekarang ni tak ada masa nak belajar lagi. :)

aku jarang ada rumah sebab tengah belajar lagi and ayah aku pun banyak kerja dia.

*tempat yang paling aku nak melancong

rasanya tak ada tempat yang spesifik. apa yang pasti, apa yang aku nak bila aku pergi melancong mestilah orang orang yang aku sayang yang menyenangkan hati aku. asalkan dengan orang orang tu pergi mana mana pun aku tak kesah. ^^ v

*lagu apa yang buat aku senyum bila aku dengar?

tak tahu lah. seriously tak tahu. agaknya lagu yang kena dengan mood time tu kot. asalkan kena dengan mood mesti boleh enjoy punya. 

*boros atau berjimat dalam berbelanja?

bila duit aku ada banyak sikit je mesti aku boros. asal ada lebih ada je aku nak beli, ada je aku nak guna. tapi bila duit dah nak habis tu pandai pulak aku nak berjimat. entahlah. aku pun tak faham mentaliti aku ni macam mana. 

*suka makan western food tak?

suka suka! western food sedap sedap belaka. 

aku ni universal. apa apa pun aku makan. badan aku keding tapi sumpah aku makan banyak gila. tanya lah kawan kawan aku. diorang pun pelik. 

*benda yang paling jahat/nakal aku pernah buat dalam hidup?

rasanya banyak lah pulak. ada benda yang aku tak dapat cerita lah kat sini. sebab tu semua macam aib aku. siapa nak cerita aib sendiri kan? haha. 

tapi benda yang aku anggap teruk aku buat masa aku darjah enam. masa tu cikgu matematik aku, cikgu ani josfina. baik sangat cikgu tu. aku tak pernah ada masalah dengan dia.

tapi, ada sekali, lepas minggu ujian. kitorang dapat markah matematik. dan untuk yang dapat A cikgu ani bagilah coklat. aku pun dapat sebab aku dapat A. cewahhhh! 

tapi masa tu pulak ada kawasan gigi geraham aku bengkak. aku tak dapat makan coklat tu. makan nasik pun tak mampu. so aku taknak terima coklat tu. cikgu ani kata kalau tak makan pun ambik lah. 

aku pun ambik. masa tu kawan kawan kelas aku panggil aku mintak aku bagi coklat tu kat diorang. aku tanpa berfikir panjang teruslah baling coklat tu kat kawan kawan aku. diorang pun berebut. 

lepas tu cikgu ani terus kata. sambil menangis tau. 

"cikgu tau hadiah yang cikgu bagi tak mewah. cikgu cuma mampu bagi coklat je. tapi cikgu harap sangat awak boleh hargai pemberian cikgu" 

macam tu lah dialog dia kot, dah lama sangat aku pun dah tak ingat. lepas dia cakap tu dia terus keluar dari kelas. kawan kawan kelas aku semua terdiam. lepas dah tak nampak cikgu je diorang semua terus pandang aku. then ramai ramai kata 

" faliq kau dah buat cikgu menangis! teruk lah kau ni! kau pergi mintak maaf kat cikgu cepat!"

aku rasa bersalah sangat. terus aku cuba mintak maaf kat cikgu ani. apa yang jadi lepas tu aku tak ingat dah. tapi itu lah salah satu benda yang aku rasa teruk aku buat.

____________________________________________________________________________

fuhhh! habis pun aku jawab semua 11 soalan ni. sepatutnya lepas habis ni aku pulak nak kena tag tag orang. tapi macam tak reti nak buat soalan sendiri. so aku nak copy paste je kot soalan yang diberi kat aku. :)  

*3 perangai orang yang paling korang tak suka?

*bila stress korang buat apa?

*apa perancangan hidup korang?

*kenangan yang paling korang tak dapat lupakan

*selain keluarga, siapa orang yang paling korang percaya dan kenapa??

*suka memasak tak??

*tempat yang paling korang nak melancong

*lagu apa yang buat korang senyum bila korang dengar?

*boros atau berjimat dalam berbelanja?

*suka makan western food tak?

*benda yang paling jahat/nakal korang pernah buat dalam hidup?

themonat.com

siamesegurl.blogspot.com

tengokblogku.blogspot.com

naziey.blogspot.com

pyroincendia.blogspot.com

espiranzagurlz.blogspot.com - inilah dia orang yang hantar tag tag ni. :)

haaa! korang buat lah pulak ekk. :)

peace!! ^^ v